Jono Bacon is Not a Cockroach

I would like to clear the air regarding comments I made about Jono Bacon being cockroach. I did not, in fact, say that Jono is a cockroach. I stated that he is like a cockroach. And even this reckless simile deserves to be understood only in the full context of my having tried to assassinate him.

(After my botched attempt to exterminate him with In N Out food, I learned on the UK LUG Tour that the man has a predilection for the McDonalds, which apparently has toughened him against the toxins of processed food and arterial plaque.)

But just to dispel any confusion may have created, this is Jono Bacon:

And this is a cockroach:

They are clearly not the same thing. That would be extremely silly: